Jazzy's New Gig

Jazzy will soon be stepping into the new role of big sister.  No, we are not getting another dog.  We are pregnant with twins! 

Say what!?!  I know this might come as a bit of a shock since I haven't said a word here on the blog about how things were progressing with our baby-making efforts.  You might have even been wondering where I had gone to since I haven't posted much of anything lately.  The fact of the matter is that I was taking a break to focus all my energy and attention on moving forward with IVF.  Then it actually worked and I started growing two babies, which takes a surprising amount of energy.  I was just too exhausted to work on other projects or blog posts.  But trust me, I am not complaining!  

I know that some of you who read this blog are struggling with infertility and I know how crushing other people's pregnancy announcements can be.  I know all too well that kick in the gut, heart-pounding, tears springing to your eyes (and not happy tears) feeling that takes over when you see that yet another person who is not you gets to have a baby.  And I know the questions that start running through your head...why does she get to have a baby and not me?...what makes her deserving and not me?...why don't I get to have a baby?  And I'm all too familiar with the guilt that follows...why can't I be happy for them?...why do I all of a sudden despise this person I love?...am I a terrible person?  At least that's what it was like for me. And it was perfectly okay to respond like this and it didn't make me a terrible person.  It just meant I was human.  

So if you are one of those people who are still struggling with infertility, my heart goes out to you.  I'm so sorry.  I know it doesn't really help to hear that someone else knows exactly how you feel, but I do.  Don't lose hope and keep moving forward.  And it's okay if you are having trouble reading this now because there are too many tears in your eyes.    

I plan to share all about how IVF went for us.  I'll get into the nitty gritty of the shots, the doctors' visits, the waiting, the exciting parts and the scary parts.  I also plan to take you along for the ride of being pregnant with twins.  

So stick along for the ride!  (Unless it hurts too much. ❤)