Thursday, June 30, 2016


Adam and I recently went on vacation to Portland and Seattle!  We decided to take a trip to celebrate our 5th anniversary.  Neither one of us had been to the northwest, so we thought we'd check it out.  Boy, are we glad we did!  We had a blast enjoying the beautiful weather, gorgeous landscape and each other's company.  

Day 1

Our first stop was Portland, Oregon.  Our flight didn't get in until the evening, so all we did on our first day in Portland was check into our hotel and eat dinner.  We decided to stay in downtown Portland at McMenamins Crystal Hotel.  

It's a fun hotel located right in the center of lots of the spots we wanted to scope out.  We could also do some fun people-watching from our window.  

I especially enjoying watching people go into the Spartacus adult entertainment store.  

While the location was perfect, the rooms clean and the staff helpful, there was one odd thing I feel I should mention.  There was no bathroom connected to our room.  There were three individual bathrooms located on our floor, which meant we got to pretend we were in college again and wear the robes they provided to get to and from our showers.  It wasn't a big deal, just something to note.  There was also a saltwater soaking tub in the basement of the building that was perfect after a long day of walking around the city.  

After getting checked into our hotel, we ate at Henry's Tavern right across the street from our hotel.  They had the most delicious thing I've ever eaten: Gorgonzola waffle fries.  I'm sure they clogged my arteries and took a year off my life, but they were worth it!  I liked them so much I convinced Adam to go back to Henry's Tavern a few nights later to enjoy them again.

Day 2  

The next morning, we decided to explore the city.  We began by eating breakfast at Mother's Bistro & Bar. Both our meals were delish!  To work off our breakfast, we explored Powell's Books, which happens to be the largest independent new and used book store in the world.  I believe it!  It was huge and had tons of books to look through.

We checked out some other cute shops and then stopped for a snack at Voodoo Donuts.  Our Vicious Hibiscus and Mango Tango donuts were yummy!  It happened to be a bit rainy when we hit up Voodoo Donuts, which actually worked in our favor.  We didn't have to stand in a long line like all the travel blogs and guide books said we would.  

Then we headed off to the Deschutes Brewery.  We thought we would be going on a brewery tour. However, the hostess kindly informed us that the tours take place 3 hours away in Bend, Oregon, not Portland.  I guess we missed that small fact when signing up for a brewery tour online.  Ooops!  We still stuck around and sampled some of the beers.

We ended our evening with a fancy dinner at Wilfs Restaurant.  Adam got us a Groupon for it and it was a good thing.  It was definitely pricey, but delicious.  It was almost too fancy for us.  We're not used to having waiters place our napkins in our laps and refill our water glasses after each sip.  But it was fun pretending that we were fancy for an evening.

Day 3  

The following day, we enjoyed a delightful breakfast at Cheryl's On 12th.  Then we decided we needed to work off some of the food and beverages we had been gorging on.  So we drove out of the city to Multnomah Falls, which is the 2nd tallest year-round waterfall in the United States.  Before we got to Multnomah Falls, we stopped to take a look at Wahkeena Falls.  

It was a happy accident that we stopped at Wahkeena Falls first.  We followed a trail that took us from Wahkeena Falls to Multnomah Falls.  It was a bit difficult and long, but it was absolutely gorgeous!  

It was almost like walking through a rain forest.  The trees towered over us and the lush ferns and plants filled in the space below the trees.  

I am not a huge nature girl, but this was breathtaking.  It was one of the prettiest places I've ever seen. The pictures don't begin to do it justice, but it does give you an idea of the beauty.  

Eventually, we made it to Multnomah Falls and got to see the waterfall from above and below.  It was pretty amazing to see the power of the waterfall up close.  

By this point, we were starving from our hike, so we stopped for a meal at Multnomah Falls Lodge.  

After our meal, we were ready for more hiking!  So we hit up Latourell Falls, which wasn't too far away. Although the waterfall was smaller, it was still pretty impressive.  There were fewer people on the trail, as well, which was nice. 

We ended our day of hiking with more Gorgonzola waffle fries at Henry's Tavern.  I figured since we hiked for hours, we deserved more of those fries.  

Day 4   

To start off our anniversary day, we had some tasty donuts at Blue Star Donuts and Stumptown Coffee.  

Then we hit up Mt. Tabor, which is a dormant volcano in the middle of Portland that's been turned into a park.  There were playgrounds, walking trails and a dog park.  Seeing all the dogs around made us miss Jazzy.  But we knew she was being spoiled by her grandparents.  

Our big adventure of the day was whitewater rafting on the Clackamas River.  It was about an hour away from Portland, so off we went.  We stopped at a cute cafe for lunch called The Mason Jar Cafe in Estacada.  

After our lunch, we headed to the Clackamas River.  Adam made reservations with Blue Sky Rafting and he sure picked a winner.  It was the best rafting experience we've had, mainly because of our guide Skip.  It was a pretty river with lots of rapids.  I think Adam and I had smiles plastered on our faces the whole time.  

After our rafting adventure, we headed back to Portland to get cleaned up for dinner.  We stopped at Fat Head's Brewery for a few drinks, then onto Jake's Famous Crawfish for dinner.  Adam tells me it was his favorite seafood restaurant of the whole trip.  I'll take his word for it since I'm not a fan of seafood.  I can speak to their wedge salad, and it was delicious.

This was the perfect way to spend our anniversary.  It was a beautiful day, full of fun.  And we got to spend it together, of course.    
Day 5

Our stay in Portland came to an end, and we started making our way towards Seattle.  We decided to stop at Cannon Beach along the way.  Even though it made our drive longer, it was worth it for the views.  

The water was very cold!  The only people swimming were surfers wearing wet suits and a few crazies only wearing a swimsuit.  I got my feet wet and Adam was a bit braver and got in to his knees.

It was stunning to see the ocean next to the forest and mountains.  It was definitely worth the drive!  

Adam and I do love a beach.  There's just something about sand in between your toes and the sound of waves crashing.  

Stay tuned for the second part of our trip in Seattle!

Monday, June 27, 2016

The Importance of Reaching Out

Over these past few weeks, I have been blown away by the kindness my friends and even complete strangers have offered me.  After getting a second opinion from Dr. Brabec, it seems like IVF will most likely be the direction Adam and I have to take if we want to have our own biological children.  I'm not throwing the hope that we could randomly get pregnant on our own out the door, but I'm trying to also be realistic about our chances.  

In an effort to get more information on the whole IVF process, I decided to reach out to others.  I asked if there were any of my friends on Facebook who went through IVF and would be willing to share their experiences with me.  I was overwhelmed with the kind responses I received.  

People so generously came forward to talk to me and offer up their stories.  I even had a friend connect me with someone who was a complete stranger to me.  I met up with her at a coffee shop and was so thankful for her willingness to share.  We were complete strangers, yet having both been through fertility struggles, it seemed as if we shared some connection.  

All of these people's kindness reminded me of how important it is to reach out to people.  It doesn't matter the situation, people need each other.  I've been the recipient of others reaching out to me, I hope that I can reach out to others, as well.  

Thursday, June 23, 2016

Something New

I am pretty pumped about our new front door.  I think it means you are officially an adult when things like doors make you smile.  

The front door that came with the house when we bought it was most likely original to the house.  It needed to be replaced.  Daylight peeked through the bottom left corner of our door, despite all the weatherstripping Adam tried to fit in there.  It wasn't anything too exciting to look at either. 

So, Adam and I did what most homeowners do when they decide to start a project.  We agreed to look for a new door and started looking around.  Then we forgot about it for a year.  Occasionally, we'd remember we were searching for a door, then we'd promptly forget about it.  

We finally got around to picking one out, paying a ridiculous amount of money and then waiting patiently to have it installed.  We ended up purchasing our door from Home Depot and having it installed through them, as well.  Our local Home Depot works with two contractors in the area that focus on only installing doors.  

Of course our door jamb was a weird size and we had to have a custom door ordered, which took more time and more money.  Once it was finally shipped to the store, the contractor called to set up a time to install it.

The day finally arrived for our big door install!  The installer was a very nice man named Nathan.  He was about the size of our door, which explained why he didn't need any other people to help him install it.  At first, Jazzy was a bit curious about what this nice man was doing to our front door.  She was content to watch from a safe distance.    

Once he started removing the old trim, things got a little noisy.  Jazzy wasn't quite as sure about what was happening at this point.  

It didn't take long for Nathan to get the door installed.  In addition to a new front door, we also had a new storm door installed.  We went back and forth on whether or not we should even replace our old storm door.  We threw around the idea of just having a front door.  Our house would definitely have more curb appeal if a storm door wasn't in front of our entry door.  But Jazzy loves to gaze longingly out of the storm door and we didn't want to take away her fun.  So we ended up picking a storm door that was full glass and would block as little of the front door as possible.  

I love all the pretty glass detail of the new door.  The decorative glass obscures the view if anyone should try to look in and it also lets in some light to our entryway.  

I have plans to paint the front door a bright, cheery blue.  I got a few samples and tested out the colors on our old front door.  You can see the colors I'm debating on in the first picture.  I'll be sure to show you all the door once I've made a paint color decision! 

Tuesday, June 21, 2016

Jazzy's Travel Tips

Jazzy loves a new adventure, especially when it involves a ride in the car.  Whether Jazzy is traveling with Adam and I or visiting her Grandma and Grandpa, there are a few things that Jazzy likes me to do to make her travels go smoothly.  

Share Her Instructions 

Adam and I know Jazzy the best out of anybody.  We know exactly what she likes.  So it makes sense to share what we know about Jazzy whenever she is visiting someone else while her mom and dad go on their own vacations.  Jazzy likes me to share tips about when and what she eats, how often she needs to go outside and the kinds of snacks she can enjoy.  I usually put all the information in a Google doc and print it out for whoever is going to take care of Jazzy.  I also like to include Jazzy's vet's contact information and the number of a local vet and emergency pet clinic.  

Pack Her Favorite Things 

Whether Jazzy will be coming along with Adam and I or if she will be away from us, she likes to have her favorite things around her.  Having her favorite things around helps her feel more comfortable in her new environment.  I always make sure Jazzy has her bed and a favorite toy.

Keep Everything Together 

Jazzy likes to keep all of her stuff in one place when traveling.  She likes to make sure she won't accidentally leave anything behind and has everything right where she needs it.  So she asks me to put all of her items in one bag when we're traveling.  I use a reusable grocery bag to hold all her essentials.  I pack her food with a scoop in a baggie for easy transport, treats, dental bones, any medicine she might need, harness, leash, collar, poop bags and favorite toy.  And Jazzy always makes sure I pack her doggy travel mug so she has water while she travels.  

Happy traveling, Jazzy! 

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Buh-Bye Polyp!

This past week has been a bit of a blur.  Two Mondays ago, Adam and I met with Dr. Brabec for a second opinion on our infertility struggles.  After meeting with her and having a sonogram done, she suggested I have an SHG to get a better look at my uterus.  I was able to schedule the SHG for Wednesday and it revealed that I had a polyp on the lining of my uterus.  It's not uncommon for women to have polyps and they aren't typically harmful.  However, they can cause infertility.  In my case, Dr. Brabec doesn't believe the polyp is what is causing our infertility.  But it certainly wasn't helping anything, so she suggested I have a minor surgery to remove it.  

She assured me that it was very routine.  She said the procedure itself would only take about 10 minutes and it wouldn't be a big deal, although I would be asleep.  While I trusted her completely, I was still a bit nervous about having surgery.  I am not a fan of paper cuts.  Needless to say, I was concerned with how I would do with surgery.  

Dr. Brabec told me that I didn't need to rush into the surgery.  But the thought of a surgery hanging over my head wasn't really something that appealed to me.  Luckily, I was able to schedule the surgery for this past Monday.  I was very thankful that I wouldn't have to think about it for very long and I could just get it over with.  My mom was able to get some time off work and be with me for the surgery and a few days afterwards.  Of course Adam was also there for me, but sometimes having your mom around is just what you need.

I did all the things you normally do when preparing for surgery.  I didn't eat or drink anything past midnight on Sunday evening.  I had to take off my nail polish.  I was a bit bummed about this because I had just painted my nails and I had actually done a really good job.  I know I'm ridiculous. 

Monday morning came around quickly.  I wasn't too nervous as we drove the the hospital or during the check in.  But I started to get more anxious when it came time for the nurse to put in the IV.  First she tried to put it the back of my forearm, between my wrist and my elbow.  After digging around for awhile, she decided the IV wouldn't work out there for me.  I am a big wimp and that hurt.  Things started to get real and I got more scared.  She was able to get the IV in my other arm at the back of my elbow.  That didn't hurt nearly as bad as before.  Then I got to wait a bit.  

Adam and my mom got to come wait with me and they helped to distract me.  But when they I left, my nerves started getting the better of me.  I started to shake a bit, which I think was just from nerves.  Then the nurse wheeled me to the operating room.  She asked me to move onto the operating table, which I did. And that's the last thing I remember.

The next thing I knew, I was waking up in the room I started out in.  The nurse was with me and started talking to me.  She was asking how I was feeling.  I remember being really sleepy, but trying to be pleasant to the nurse and answer all her questions.  Eventually, I started feeling less sleepy and Adam and my mom were allowed to come back in the room with me.  

I wasn't in any pain and Dr. Brabec said everything went very well.  She removed the polyp and was able to smooth out some other part of my uterus.  Look at how lovely my uterus looks now!  

I was surprised at how little pain I felt after the surgery.  I had some very minor cramping and just a little bit of bleeding.  I even felt up for going out for lunch.  After lunch, I took it easy for the rest of the day. The following day I felt even better and my mom and I spent the day shopping.

I was so happy everything went so smoothly and that it's over with!  I was also especially happy to have Adam and my mom there for me.  This is just one more step in the right direction towards getting pregnant!    

Saturday, June 11, 2016

The Great Wall

I am so excited to share how our planter bed turned out!  I talked about how boring the side of our house was here.  I mean, look how boring this is: 

So, Adam got to work building us a beautiful retaining wall/planter bed.  His engineering skills helped him build a wall that was perfectly level and very solid.  I doubt this thing will be moving around anytime soon.  At one point, a neighbor of ours came over and asked if we were building the Great Wall of China.  :)   

Here's how that side of our house looks now: 

Isn't that such a huge improvement?  The wall looks super professional.  Just check out that curved part!  

While this project did take a lot of time on Adam's part, it was pretty inexpensive.  We used the paver stones from the circular garden in our backyard that we took out.  Since we took out the circular garden, we were also able to use the gravel, dirt and plants that were in it.  The only things we bought to complete this project were some paver base and mulch.

Since this side of the house gets very little sun, we planted hostas for the majority of the plants.  Hostas do very well in shade and there are lots of varieties to give you different colors and textures.  We also added some irises and peonies.  I'm not so sure how well they will do in the shade, but the plants were free so we thought we'd give it a shot.      

I find myself gravitating towards that side of the house now!  I like to wander over there and look at how pretty it is.  Nice work, Adam! 

Friday, June 10, 2016

Storage Ideas for Craft Supplies

I'm a little embarrassed to share the following pictures with you all.  It is what the closet in my guest bedroom looked like prior to a little organizing I recently did.  I kept random home decor items, tons of craft supplies and a bunch of mementos I haven't been able to part with over the years.  

Yikes!  It was getting a bit out of hand.  I could barely get the closet doors open and I couldn't easily find what I was looking for when I needed something.  So I decided I needed to do some organizing.  While I would have loved to put in an Elfa closet system or build it out with more shelving, that just didn't make sense.  It is Adam and my's hope that we'll have kids someday and they will likely need a closet to house their clothing.  So my goal was to use the closet as is.  

So I started by taking everything out of the closet.  As I did so, I made a pile of stuff that could be thrown away.  I don't know why I was saving things like old calendar pages.  I also made a pile of anything that I didn't want anymore that could be donated to Goodwill.  By this point, the room was a complete disaster! 

After sorting through everything, I started to put like items together so I would know what all needed to go back into the closet.  I put all the frames and artwork together, all the home decor items together, all the craft supplies together, and so on.  

Then I started putting things back in the closet.  I kept all the like items together, so I will know exactly where to look when I need to find something from now on.  While the closet isn't exactly beautiful, it is way more organized.  

Some of my favorite organizing tools include the plastic drawers.  I like that you can see through them, so you know exactly what's inside.  Plus they prevent things from getting dusty.  

Another favorite organizing tool of mine is a hanging shoe organizer on the back of the bedroom door.  It's the perfect way to organize smaller things.  It's also easy to find and grab what you need quickly.  

The hanging shoe organizer perfectly houses random things like stamps and balloons.  Plus, the black and white pattern on this one makes it more fun to look at.  

I'm so happy my blood pressure doesn't spike every time I try to find something in my closet now!  I can easily find what I need and it looks much, much better.  I'm sure some of these ideas could work for whatever you have that needs organizing, too!   

Wednesday, June 8, 2016


Today was the day I had my SHG and I am happy to report that I survived!  An SHG is a Saline Infusion Sonohysterogram.  Basically, it's a guided tour of your uterus.  It allows the doctor to check out your uterine lining and see if there are any polyps, fibroids and/or adhesions.

I was a bit nervous about it.  I'm pretty much a wimp when it comes to doing anything medically-related. I was already on edge because I had to have my blood drawn on both Monday and Tuesday.  And then today I had to go have this procedure done.  So much fun. 

It turned out to be just fine.  It certainly wasn't pleasant, but it was relatively quick and bearable.  Allow me to explain how things went in case you are interested or get to endure one of these for yourself. 

I was scheduled to have the SHG, as well as a trial embryo transfer.  The trial embryo transfer helps the doctor figure out the how to place the catheter that will transfer the embryos to your uterus if you end up doing IVF.  Since IVF is on the table for us, I decided to go ahead and have the trial embryo transfer done along with the SHG.  In order to do this, you have to have a full bladder.  If you show up and your bladder isn't full, then the doctor will have to catheterize your bladder to fill it up.  I didn't want to have that happen, so I made sure to drink lots of water prior to the appointment.  I must say, both the doctor and nurse were quite impressed with my full bladder.     

I was also told to eat a small meal and take ibuprofen 1-2 hours prior to the procedure.  My appointment was at 1:00, so I had a small lunch around noon and took some ibuprofen right afterwards.  The ibuprofen is to help take the edge off of the cramping that will happen.

When I arrived for my appointment, I told the doctor and nurse that I am a big wimp and was very nervous.  My doctor took my hands in her hands and thanked me for letting her know.  She said letting her know exactly how I'm feeling helps them help me.  I almost started crying right then and there.  She is such a nice change from my other experiences with fertility doctors.  The nurse was also kind enough to give me a head's up with what to expect and reminded me to keep breathing throughout the procedure.  

The first thing they did was the trial embryo transfer since that was the part that needed the full bladder.  It only took about 3 minutes and was mildly uncomfortable.  The doctor put in a speculum, then threaded different catheters through my cervix and got them positioned correctly in my uterus.  While this was going on, the nurse did an ultrasound on my stomach to help guide the doctor.  So now, if we end up doing IVF, she'll know exactly which catheter to use and how to position it when it comes time for the embryo transfer.  I did have some cramping, but it wasn't too awful.  They both kept telling me to breathe and that I was doing a great job.    

Once that was finished, I got to go empty my bladder, which was greatly appreciated.  Then the doctor did a vaginal ultrasound in preparation for the SHG.  A vaginal ultrasound involves putting this wand thing inside of you and moving it around a bit to get different views.  This didn't hurt at all.

Then it was time for the SHG.  The doctor started by putting in a speculum and then putting a catheter through my cervix.  From there, saline is run through the catheter into my uterus.  Then, a little balloon is inflated to help keep the saline from running out of your cervix.  This part hurt and there was some cramping.  It helps if you try not to clench all your muscles, which is difficult not to do.  Breathing also helped, especially taking nice deep breaths and exhaling for a long time.  The nurse clued me into this, while rubbing my knee and telling me I was doing a fantastic job.  Then the doctor takes the speculum out and does another vaginal ultrasound.  This only lasted a few minutes, as well.  

When it was all said and done, the nurse had me lie down for awhile before I sat up.  Then she had me sit up for awhile before standing up.  She said it's not uncommon for women to get light-headed or pass out when you are messing with the cervix.  Taking everything slowly helped me out and I didn't feel like fainting like I did when I had a HSG done.  

After I was all dressed again, I met with the doctor to tell me what she saw.  She told me that there is a little polyp that measures about 1 cm on my uterus.  She said it's not hugely concerning and is not the reason I haven't gotten pregnant yet.  But she did recommend operative hysteroscopy, which is a surgery to remove it.  She said I would be put under and they could do the surgery vaginally.  It's a short surgery that only takes about 10 minutes and I would go home the same day.  The surgery would ensure that my uterus is the best environment in can be to hopefully house a baby someday.  

All in all, it went well.  It wasn't as traumatic as I was anticipating.  And my doctor and nurse were so sweet and comforting.  I don't have any pain or cramps now and I even treated myself to some frozen custard for having to go through the whole ordeal.  

More than likely, I'll have the surgery to remove the polyp and then go from there.  Until then, I'll enjoy things like frozen custard on a beautiful, sunny, summer day.  

Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Getting a Second Opinion

Adam and I decided to get a second opinion from another infertility doctor.  While we don't really have anything too negative to say about our previous doctor, we just never really felt a strong connection to the doctor or the practice.  Perhaps that's because we never spent much time with the doctor.  

Adam has mentioned that he'd read if people aren't happy with the results they were getting with their infertility clinics, then they should try out another doctor.  It makes perfect sense.  People get second opinions all the time for lots of medical reasons.  So, we decided to try out a different practice.  

After hearing Dr. Brabec speak at the Kansas City Infertility Awareness conference, we were sold.  She seemed to genuinely care about what she does and seemed incredibly knowledgeable.  The fact that she came to speak at the conference which was held on a Saturday said a lot.  

So I called to set up an appointment in May and we went yesterday.  I have a much better feeling about Dr. Brabec and the staff we interacted with yesterday.  We spent 3 hours at Dr. Brabec's office yesterday and spoke with several different people.  In fact, we got to sit down and speak with Dr. Brabec for a good 30 minutes.  We had her undivided attention and I appreciated her realistic approach.  In addition to everyone being incredibly kind and compassionate with our situation, they also seemed professional and organized.    

We didn't exactly get the news we were hoping for.  I think both Adam and I hoped they would look over our records and do some new tests and find a reason why we weren't getting pregnant that could be easily (and inexpensively) fixed.  That hasn't been the case so far.  We seem to have a lot of little things that are not making it easy for us to conceive.  

While Dr. Brabec presented us with some options, her recommendation is to move forward with IVF.  After hearing about the process and the injections and the cost, our heads were spinning.  To say it was overwhelming would be an understatement.  I guess I never really thought we would have to end up at this point.  But here we are.  We have a big decision to make.  

I'm not going to lie.  IVF scares the crap out of me.  It sounds incredibly invasive and intense.  It is super expensive.  And of course there's no guarantee that we'll end up with a healthy baby when it's all said and done.  

But then I keep asking myself, "What if it works?  What if we do end up with a healthy baby?  Wouldn't that be worth it all?"  We are both thinking things over and not sure what to do.  I know we'll eventually come to the right decision for us.  But it's a hard place to be in right now.  I spent a good portion of our time at the doctor's office (and afterwards) crying.  My eyes are quite puffy today.  

In the meantime, we are having some bloodwork done and I am scheduled to do a SHG (Saline Infusion Sonohysterogram) tomorrow.  That's were the doctor fills your uterus up with saline so they can get a better look at your uterus.  I'm a bit nervous about it.  I had a similar test called an HSG (Hysterosalpingogram) done a couple years ago and it was not pleasant.  It hurt and as the doctor was telling me how it went afterwards I started to feel like I was going to faint.  I had to interrupt him and tell him I needed to lie down.  The nurse I spoke with yesterday told me the SHG shouldn't be as bad as the HSG.  I'll be sure to let you know.  Until then, my face will look like this...

Thursday, June 2, 2016

I Wonder What Jazzy Does All Day...

On more than one occasion, I have wondered what Jazzy does while Adam and I are at work all day.  I wish that we could set up some cameras so we could see exactly how she spends her time.  I envision that she has dance parties to the radio that Adam leaves on for her from time to time.  Maybe she decides to climb onto the top of the kitchen cabinets to get a little treat for herself.  Or perhaps she jumps up and down on all the beds.

Since I'm a teacher and have the perk of getting to stay home during the summer, I've gotten a little bit of insight into how she fills her days.  And I must say, I'm a little underwhelmed. 

She likes to sleep on top of the couch cushions...

...and in our bed.

When I let her out in the front yard, she likes to take a nap in the sun...

...and when I let her out in the backyard, she likes to catch some zzzz's while laying on a large rock.

I suppose there's still the chance that she does something other than sleep while we're gone, but I highly suspect sleeping is her favorite pastime.  Sweet dreams, little Jazzy!